I recall that what I did was to take that ever-present sense of loneliness - the one that continually grew if I focused on it - and determined its inverse, and turned it into that. Instead of being lonely because I was by myself, I saw my unallocated love pour out onto everything that shares my existence. It's wonderful, and I still have to remember to be this rather than return to the gloom that has been my familiar abode over the last decade and more - a depression that became a safe place to be, something that I was loathe to relinquish - and continue to fend off.
This is a quote from a typewriter journal entry that I found and posted it to my blog, journal year unknown:
"I think this is harder to describe because, at least as much as it is a new feeling (or mood or mindset; it is the state of my mind and soul), it is the tangible void of something old and familiar, the absence of something that had a stranglehold on me and constricted tightly around the organ in me that feels happiness and contentment."
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